COUGAR MOUNTAIN REGIONAL WILDLAND PARK, WA:

was a perfect day for a hike! I must admit, I was preparing for a wet and rainy day, which I was ready to embrace, but I was delighted by the cool, overcast weather that accompanied me throughout my journey. An early riser, I arrived at the Licorice Fern Trailhead just a quarter past 7 am. I almost drove right past the trailhead since it was next to a driveway, but a quick U-turn set me straight. I grabbed my pack, poles, shoes, and couldn’t help but chuckle at the clearly marked “Trail” sign guiding my way. Lesson one: pay attention! As I embarked on my 5-mile hike, I quickly sensed that there was some elevation today beginning with a pleasant descent toward the light sound of a creek. I welcome this additional elevation gain to continue to push my knee a little further with each hike.

There were two destinations in mind for my hike—first, the beautiful Far Country Falls, and then a lookout point in Cougar Mountain Regional Wildland Park—this gave me anticipation with each step. The view from the lookout was narrow, but just as nice. The falls were beautiful, small yet cascading gracefully down the mountain in a few breathtaking streams. I enjoyed the moment so much that I found a rock at the bottom to sit and soak in the soothing sounds of the falls. After a quick snack, I continued on, backtracking to another trail leading to the lookout. The lookout point was my turnaround spot, complete with a bench for a quick rest. A few friendly hikers passed by, adding to the cheerful atmosphere as I took advantage another moment on the path. My return to the trailhead felt a bit quicker, perhaps due to the elevation, my growing familiarity with the trail, or simply because there were fewer “photo” pauses along the way. After two and a half satisfying hours, I returned to my car, driving home with a warm sense of accomplishment for the day. By warm, I mean using the seat warmer to get ahead of what felt like the signs of a little stress on my lower back.

I had read that the Washington Trails Association (WTA) has made some recent improvements to the trail, and I feel grateful to witness their dedicated efforts. I truly admire the love and passion that goes into maintaining the trails I cherish. Their mission to “mobilize hikers and everyone who loves the outdoors to explore, steward and champion trails and public lands” resonates with me. I’m confident that my enjoyment of the trails will inspire me to contribute to this worthy mission over time. For now, I will wholeheartedly support their amazing work and embrace the philosophy of “leave no trace” to help preserve it.

For today’s journey, I brought with me the uplifting thought of “positivity” to ponder. It’s been an inspiring theme lately. To make this fun, I think I’ll challenge myself to use a hiking metaphor for some of the concepts. Appropriate for the topic, I get to do this on another beautiful trail in the Pacific Northwest, where the stunning beauty surrounding me fills me with joy—the towering trees, the cheerful flutter of birds, the playful rustling of bushes from curious squirrels, and the soothing sound of rushing water in the distance. As I embraced the concept of “positivity,” it became clear that positivity can be a powerful force, much like the trails we walk. Some people see positivity as a guiding light, illuminating their path, while others might view it as a challenge to embrace. Both perspectives are valid and meaningful, offering insights into the complexity of human behavior.

More often than not, I embrace positivity with open arms. For me, positivity isn’t about sidestepping life’s challenges; instead, it’s an intentional choice to spotlight the silver linings that shine amidst the clouds—which sometimes can be very dark. Using our hiking metaphor, this outlook resembles reaching a stunning summit after a challenging climb, where the breathtaking view and the rewarding effort go hand in hand. It’s about savoring joy in the little things—a child’s laughter (for me, our grandson), a shared smile with a someone along the trail, or the gentle warmth of the sun in my face. By intentionally cultivating positivity, it nurtures a positive mindset and creates ripples of joy that spread to others, much like sharing a magnificent view with a passing hiker. It’s the recognition that even when life gets tough, there’s always a reason to be thankful.

I appreciate that some individuals may find themselves feeling overwhelmed by the idea of positivity. This feeling can be similar to embarking on a challenging trail, where the path seems steep or rocky, and the experience might feel more like a burden than it is uplifting. Those who are skeptical about positivity might see it as overlooking their hardships, as if they are being encouraged to simply “look on the bright side” without really validating their current situation, a feeling and sentiment I’m familiar with. For people with this view, it’s not necessarily about rejecting positivity; it’s more about desiring to approach it at their own pace, when it feels right for them. When timing is not right, others may seek genuine understanding and compassion, similar to a hiker who appreciates acknowledgment of their struggle rather than a quick motivational message about admiring the view.

The heart of this divide may lie in a misunderstanding between these two perspectives, yet there is an opportunity for connection. The positive thinker celebrates the immense benefits of a positive outlook—resilience, improved mental health, and a vibrant sense of community—while the one who feels pressured to be positive might view these as oversimplifications. Imagine if individuals from both perspectives could pause on their respective trails and engage in a heartfelt conversation; they would likely discover that positivity can coexists with pain, and enrich the experience with vulnerability and authenticity. Just as two hikers can share the same path, they can also share their stories and uncover the common ground that brings them closer together.

To bridge this communication and understanding gap, individuals from both perspectives can take a moment to listen and reflect with open hearts. Practicing empathy can be a rewarding experience, recognizing that relentless positivity, while uplifting, may not resonate with everyone all the time. By sharing our own stories of struggle, we can illustrate that our positivity often arises from overcoming hardships. Those who feel pressured to maintain a positive outlook might find value in pausing to express their emotions and thoughts, explaining that it’s not positivity they resist, but the timing of when to embrace it. This opportunity for connection can transform a challenging conversation into a meaningful exchange, celebrating the beautiful messiness of life and the rich complexity of perspectives and emotions.

In my own journey, the loss of my wife and best friend has been a significant, devastating, and transformative experience. As I hike these trails, I am continually reminded of the love we shared and the wonderful memories that enrich my life, but I am also reminded of the void; the side of the bed that never gets messy; the other sink that is always dry; and the empty passenger seat that craves conversation, to name a few. Amidst these challenges, I choose to embrace gratitude, which strengthens my resolve. I find immense joy in my children, in the connections I’ve forged with others who have faced similar losses, and in the valuable lessons learned through grief. It is entirely possible to experience deep sadness while also nurturing a sense of gratitude and positivity. Just like the trails I walk—sometimes rugged, sometimes smooth—life is a beautiful blend of experiences that can coexist. By allowing both feelings to be part of my journey, I honor Kelly’s memory while also carving a path toward healing and hope. This trail will take time to navigate, but I know that positivity is about carrying the memories with grace and embracing the joy that comes with each step forward.

-Ken

• Renton, Washington 47°30′11.16″N 122°42.156″W
• 5.2 miles | 735′ elevation gain | ~2.5 hours
• 45 degrees with overcast